You Know You're A Runner If

Florida East Coast Runners

You Know You're A Runner If...

            you know how to pronounce (correctly) Plantar Fasciitis

            you have a favorite ice pack

            you laugh about chaffing

            your massage therapist knows your race schedule

            you brag about losing toenails

            you're insulted when someone mentions how healthy you look

            your room smells like a nursing home because of all the analgesic you use

            a pot is started to bet on when your next toenail will fall off

            you run even though you are sick

            you put more time and work into taping parts of your body than to your tax return

            you go through a box of Band-Aids without getting a single cut

            there are permanent blood stains on your T-shirts where your nipples were rubbed raw

            it hurts worse to take a shower than it does to keep running

            you find yourself standing in front of the mirror trying to see if you have a leg length discrepancy

            you know the names and remedies for every possible injury from bursitis to shin splints

            you could teach a class about biomechanics and the different kinds of shoes people need

            you are the only person in town who knows what Quinine is used for besides treating malaria

            your physical therapist or massage therapist is on speed dial

            your rolling pin is kept near your bed instead of in the kitchen

            every T-shirt you own has a race name and sponsors listed on it

            your socks come in two categories: running socks and others

            you go from having a drawer for your running clothes to having an entire bureau for running clothes

            you have tons of race shirts but can't find a work shirt for the life of you

            you balk at the cost of everyday shoes and then spend $75 - $100 on a pair of running shoes that will only last 3 months and think you're getting a fabulous deal

            you refuse to buy shorts with a seam longer than 2 inches

            you think a black Timex Ironman watch goes with black tie dress

            you are constantly washing running clothes but have to go through piles of clothes on the floor to find work clothes each morning

            you can shop at REI and your local running store for hours, but can't stand 5 minutes anywhere else

            you spend $12 on socks that help you avoid blisters

            you have more shoes than your girlfriend or girl friends (as the case may be)

            you have to explain to everyone why you can't run in the T-shirts you get at races

            a football game has 12:57 remaining and all you think is that would be awesome if that was my 5k PR

            you've said "she'd be one hell of a pole vaulter" at a strip club


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You Know You're A Cross Country Runner If...

          your shoes have more miles on them than your car does

          you have chafing in strange places

          you can spit while running

          all your socks are either stained or torn

          you go to a golf course.............. to run

          your coach won't give you a ride home

          your friends go on the elevator and you beat them on the stairs

          you combine phrases like "10 mile run" and "Easy Run" in the same breath

          you can eat your weight in spaghetti

          a meal involves more than 3 servings!

          your highest heels are your training shoes

          you spend more on training clothes than school/work clothes

          your Christmas list includes more than one pair of running shoes

          you've been to a golf course in every city but not to play golf

          your entire family goes to X-C meets because they have been or will be on the team

          your chest is as flat as your back

          you feel lost without your water-bottle

          you have running withdrawal if you don't run everyday

          you eat spaghetti three times a day

          the mile in P.E. becomes your warm-up

          Gatorade is your drug of choice

          ibuprofen is your drug of choice

          you give up homecoming to go to a Meet

          you have to run around in the shower to get wet

          you enjoy running hills

          you start to crave Power Bars

          your favorite food group is carbohydrates

          your women's team has leg hair longer than the grass they ran on

          you can strip and change in a bus seat in less than 2 minutes

          you don't puke your first day of basketball practice

          there are no flies by your gym locker

          your sport is other sport's punishment

          when you do bad you get to play longer

          you can maintain a 5:30 pace uphill while throwing up

          you think track is for wussies

          your room smells like Icy-Hot and New-Skin

          you own spandex in more than 1 color

          pizza, pasta, pizza, & pasta are your four food groups

          your watch is more expensive and complicated than your car

          even your dress shoes have spikes

          Steve Prefontaine's Birthday is more important than yours

          you aspire to pain

          you know as many kinds of pain as Eskimos have words for snow

          you hit targets with your snot rocket

          you drink more water than Free Willy

          you get pulled over after practice, and can't walk straight because you're so tired

          you ran sub 5 on the P.E. mile run

          you wore spikes on the P.E. mile run

          you did a 30 minute warm up for the P.E. mile run

          you did all of the above for the P.E. mile run

          you routinely race dogs down the street...and win

          dogs follow you everywhere you go

          you rabbit for the rabbit

          there's nothing like intervals to start the week off fresh!!

          watching the New York Marathon on T.V. made you get up and go for a run

          you can say "I like to run" in over five different languages

          you run the day after State

          off-season training starts a week after State

          your calves are bigger than your biceps

          you can pronounce those funny Kenyan names

          you're proud that another team has quadrupled you're score

          you wear skimpier clothes than Madonna

          you refer to puke as a normal bodily function

          you can hallucinate and get high at the same time without taking anything

          you always win in your sleep but never in a real race

          you wake up in the morning and find that you're already running

          the Ritz is your idol, and not a hotel in New York

            you have lots of t-shirts that have had the sleeves torn off of them due to stops in the woods


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